flannels, cut off jeans, and beards. big ones. bushy ones. store your sandwich for later/house a small family of birds/long enough to be french braided all at the same time ones. in denver at least, this whole beard thing leaves all of the men looking like joaquin phoenix during his “i’m retiring from acting to focus on my rap music” phase.
naturally, my brother is always on trend.
lucky for me, and my mother, and most importantly, the brother’s girlfriend, he has generously offered to shave it off (for a donation, of course).
throughout the night, there will be jars labeled with different facial hair styles. the lovely attendees will then get to “put their money where their mustache is” and donate cash to whichever style they think best. the fullest jar at the end of the night wins and thus the shaving begins.
so, i’ve decided to compile some inspiration using the best (worst) beards/mustaches/excuse me sir, you have something on your face-s. it’s important not to look at the man behind the mustache, but imagine my brother behind it instead.
november isn’t here yet and march is long gone. let’s officially make may the month to
SHAVE THAT BEARD.
also please remember, if you vote for pedro, all of your wildest dreams will come true.